Dealing With Distance

I hope I’m not getting too personal here but, I happen to be in a long distance relationship. We have been dating for almost 4 months but we have been the best of friends forever. It gets hard not being able to see him though.

This is my boyfriend and me (photo credit: Katrina Tocci)

As a freshman, I’ve learned quickly that adjusting to college life means a new place and new friends. Even if home is down the road, life is so much different as a college student. Whether it’s a long-term relationship with a significant other, a group of friends, or your family- here are some tips that I’ve used with my boyfriend that may work for your relationships:

1. Stay connected. Now I know that it’s hard to always keep in contact with him/her but do your best. If you can’t use texting- quick and easy!

2. Make ooVoo or Skype dates. The technology we have today is amazing, so use it for your benefit. Did I mention both services are free? So set times that both of you can sit down and video chat. It’s as close as you are going to get to actually being with them. I video chat a few times a week or even every night.

Us on ooVoo (photo credit: ooVoo snapshot)

3. When you do see each other DO NOT plan elaborate things. Don’t go down to New York City and watch a Broadway show and then go to some fancy restaurant. Things like that can be overwhelming for both people. Plan a movie night and order pizza or just do something you normally would if you still saw each other often.

4. Surprises aren’t always nice. Don’t just show up at his or her dorm, house or apartment. It can honestly freak some people out, and really mess up plans. I read an article about this guy who went away to college and one morning he woke up and found his girlfriend lying next to him smiling. That’s creepy- not cute! It throws people off guard!

5. Be confident with each other. Worrying about what each other is doing will only cause problems. If it’s meant to be, it will!

Like I said before I hope this wasn’t too personal. I just know how hard it is to be away from someone you love. I found something out the first night I moved in to Lima, at Saint Rose the people are amazing. I was crying one night near Saint Joseph’s Hall and on the phone with my boyfriend when someone came up to me. She asked me what was wrong and I told her I was on the phone with my boyfriend and I really missed him. She proceeded to go inside, I figured she was done, she came back outside with a note and handed to me and then hugged me. The note read,

“I was and still am with my boyfriend from high school. I understand how tough it can be. If you need anything I’m an RA in Lima, or you can e-mail me.”

I still have the note. I couldn’t believe the kindness she gave me and I had only just met her. Those are the people here at Saint Rose. They are people who can relate and will try to help! I’m sorry I got sidetracked but I hope this helps anybody out there!

Us at his dance for school! (photo used with permission from Nicholar Sinclair)